Being a mom means always being tired...

Friday, December 16, 2005

...At least I assume that is the case. I have been trying to convince myself to get up an hour before the kids to have devotional time in the morning. The kids usually wake up about 7:30am, but this morning Gavin woke me up at 6:30am and I feel like poo. A night that I didn't have insomnia and the baby slept through the night, so I am awoken by my 2yo getting under the covers and sticking his cold feet on me. It was sweet cuddles, but man- I am NOT a morning person.

A huge part of me really struggles with that. I picture myself waking up at 5am, having an hour devo w/ Him, cooking breakfast for the family, starting some laundry, and of course, actually getting dressed and ready instead of lounging in my sweats and combing my hair 30 minutes before my husband gets home from work. But every morning that I wake up before 7:30am I feel horrible. And mean. It takes at least 30 minutes for me to be nice to anyone, or even open my eyes all the way. How on earth am I going to achieve this wonderful early morning routine? I know it is possible- starting small.

I have a huge problem with trying to change everything at once. And then when I fail, I give up- but not before belittling myself and getting depressed that I am just a horrible mother and wife.

Surely I am not the only mom with this problem. I am slowly getting better- with a LOT of prayer and asking the church to pray for me to be more focused and less discouraged.

So the goal of today- trying to mentally psyche myself into being more willing to get up early... and praying for God to help me improve my morning attitude. I think maybe 6:30 is a reasonable goal for now.

We'll see how it goes!


Let see how this thing works...

Thursday, December 15, 2005

OK. After more hours reading blogs than I care to admit, I am starting my own. I woke up last night around 4am to go to the bathroom, and I couldn't go back to sleep- a common occurance when I have a lot on my mind. Laying there, shamelessly cuddling my hubby in an attempt to settle down, I had a thought:

Maybe writting down some of the things going through my head would get them OUT of my head so I can stop the sleep-deprived nights.

I don't know if it will work, but I figure it is good for some cheap therapy if nothing else. And, there is always the off chance that someone else can get something beneficial from my ramblings.

Warning to any readers- I apologize in advance for being wordy. I am a chatty person by nature, and that carries over into my writing. I am also unabashedly Christian. I am very much a work in progress, and as you will see as more posts come, most of my struggles with sleepless nights are from laying there pondering Him and how to live a better life (and give my family a better life). I am a worry wart, but I think most moms are.

A quick profile of me:
I am 24 years old.
I am from Houston, TX.
I am HAPPILY married to James.
I have 3 blessings:
Trent, 8
Gavin, 2
Abbie, 1
I am a computer geek.

You will probably learn more about me in the coming posts than you care to...